I'm in pain. Physically, mentally and emotionally. I'm feeling a little more hopeful now. But just a few days ago I was having panic attacks and seriously feeling down on myself.
I've given myself some sort of strain, sprain, pinch, or something. Back in May I was knitting 3-4 hours a night on my Find Your Fade Shawl as well as my Umaro Blanket. It's all a little fuzzy now, but I do remember developing pain in my pinkie fingers when knitting my Fade. Eventually, I finished my blanket and shortly after I started having pain at work, using a mouse and keyboard all day.
Since the beginning of June I haven't knit. It might be killing me. I'm so scared that I will have to give up knitting forever. I keep telling myself that even abstaining from knitting for 6 months wouldn't be so bad if I knew that I would be back in shape to knit for the rest of my life.
So far I haven't had any such reassurance from any doctors. The orthopedic surgeon brushed me off since I had little tingling and no problems on my x-rays. My general doctor just gave me a corticosteriod to take for 6 days. I don't know if that did anything. No one will diagnose me. No one will give me any other tests. I'm feeling a bit lost.
I have pain in my pinkie fingers, forearms, neck, and back. Work is getting easier since I bought an ergonomic mouse.
I still can't knit.
I tried Portuguese knitting. It didn't help. Turns out the pain comes from how I hold my needles. My pinkies can't handle it right now.
I'm going to a massage therapist tomorrow who specializes in medical massage. He thinks it's my neck. I hope he's right and he can fix it.
I've got a lot going on in my life. I just bought a house for the first time. I got engaged. It's a lot to handle.
I hope I can distract myself with some other hobbies while my hands fix themselves. I've got sewing, coloring, blogging, gaming, reading. I haven't done any cross stitch for a long while.
I might get in to photography, too, I'd love to take more flattering pictures of my knitting projects and yarn.
I just want some help. I just want to feel better. I feel like part of me is missing without my knitting. I can't even look at others' knitting projects on Ravelry or Instagram without feeling depressed.
:(
